Morgyn Leri (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
morgynleri) wrote2008-01-24 11:39 pm
morgynleri) wrote2008-01-24 11:39 pm
Crack!Fic; PG13
Three pieces of cracky goodness written for ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
itinerant_vae's Write a fic, leave a prompt game. Plus two more stories from prompts given elsewhere.
And... I need more prompts for cracky goodness. I am in the mood to write crack tonight. Prompt me?
Title: All Your Fault
Fandoms: Torchwood, Doctor Who, Star Wars
Other places of relevence: Foxhole
Rating: PG
"This is all your fault." Morgyn rolled over onto her side, pointedly turning her back on the man sitting on the edge of the bed. "Why the hell did I take you home in the first place?"
"Because I'm very persuasive." A hand rubbed her shoulder, and she shrugged it off irritably.
"No. You're not that persuasive." She paused, turning her head to look at Jack, a smirk on her face. "RTD is persuasive. Something about a guest-spot on an episode if I brought you and the Doctor for a visit."
Jack pouted a moment before shrugging. "What did you have in mind for a guest spot?"
"Oh, I was thinking I'd like to be the villian of the week on an episode of Doctor Who." She frowned, sitting up to look around the room. "Speaking of the Doctor, we should find him before he does something terribly embaressing, like fangirl at Yoda."
Jack rolled his eyes, grabbing his great-coat from where it was tossed over the back of a chair. "You sleep. I'll find the Doctor."
Morgyn was already grabbing her jacket, and hat. "Oh, no, you're not going out there alone. For all I know, you'll flirt with Obi-Wan and seduce him away from the Jedi, and then we'll have a code to deal with on top of whatever short the Extractor has this time."
Title: Drinks and an Umbrella
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: PG13
Prompt: Owen/Tosh - mixed drinks and umbrellas, frommatsujo9
"One daquiri for the most brilliant woman this side of hell, and something... I'm actually not sure what it is." Owen set the drinks on the low table before flopping on the towel next to Tosh, safely in the shade of the over-sized umbrella stuck in the sand. "It's green."
Tosh raised her head, lifting her sunglasses with one hand to study Owen's drink a moment. "It looks dangerous."
"It's safe enough for humans, Tosh. Or they wouldn't serve it to me, remember?" Owen leaned on one arm, his gaze sweeping over Tosh slowly, an appreciative smirk on his face. "Did I ever tell you that you look very sexy in that swimsuit?"
Tosh returned his smirk, letting her sunglasses drop back into place before turning a page in her book. "Only every time you come back with another drink."
Owen's smirk widened a fraction, and he reached for his drink. He could take his time getting Tosh back to his hotel room. After all, it wasn't like the rest of Torchwood was actually looking for a way to go home, either.
Title: Dancing
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: PG13
Prompt: Torchwood team and dancing, fromdonutsweeper
"Are you sure about this?" Gwen eyed the dress Ianto had zipped her into dubiously in the mirror again. "I don't know if I could dance in this."
"You'll be fine." Jack gave her a charming smile, offering her his arm to escort her. "You look great, Gwen. I promise."
Ianto came back into the hotel lobby, smoothly stepping between Jack and Gwen, and wrapping his arm around her waist, reaching his hand for Jack's. "The car's here, and Owen and Tosh are already getting ahead of the schedule. Shall we go?"
Gwen giggled as Jack rolled his eyes, wrapping his hand around Ianto's, and heading for the door, pulling them along with him.
~ ~~ ~
The music still hung in the air as the five stumbled back into into the Hub, dragged back to Cardiff from the alien dance club by the Rift Manipulator and their timer. Ianto and Gwen held each other up long enough to collapse on the couch, still winded from that last number Jack had dragged them out onto the floor for.
Owen sprawled in his chair, and dragged Tosh into his lap as Jack hummed along to the fading music, his eyes gleaming wickedly.
"Remind me which planet we just got back from?" Gwen leaned her head back against the wall, the cooler air of the Hub making her shiver a moment as the sweat began to dry on her skin. Ianto wrapped an arm around her, pulling her so her head rested on his shoulder, and she snuggled into his warmth.
"Denabi. Dancing as worship, the more complex, the more devotional." Jack grinned, grabbing Tosh's chair, and sat straddling it, his arms leaning against the back of it.
"For a fertility deity." Ianto added. "Usually ending in an orgy."
"Too bad we didn't stay for the finish then, isn't it?"
Title: Can We Keep It?
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: G
Prompt: alien unicorns, frombaffledking
"Those are not what I was thinking when you said unicorns, Jack!" Gwen buried her face in Ianto's shoulder, trying to stop laughing.
"I did say they were alien unicorns!" Jack rolled his eyes as he headed for his office, peeling off his soaked shirt, and tossing it in the general direction of the hamper next to the autopsy room.
"They looked more like a mad science experiment, sir." Ianto was smirking, and settled Gwen in her chair before heading for the kitchenette to make some coffee.
"It was nice of them to invite you home with them." Gwen broke into another fit of giggles as Jack leaned out of his office to make a rude and suggestive gesture in her direction. "Aw, Jack, they liked you!"
"We would have come back for you," Ianto added, setting out three mugs on a tray. "They would have become bored sooner or later. They were still children."
"Looking for a pet!" Jack came out of his office, glaring at them both as Gwen giggled harder, and Ianto merely smirked, holding up the tray with mugs full of coffee.
Title: Alien Flu and Tea
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: G
Prompt: Jack has the flu, fromtaffimai
"Drink the tea, sir, it will help."
"I'm not sick, Ianto."
"You have a temperature of 102, you've gone through a box of tissues in the last hour, and you can't get out of bed." Ianto gave Jack a patient stare, holding the mug of tea to Jack's lips. "Drink the tea, sir."
Jack glared a moment longer before obediently opening his mouth, letting Ianto tip some of the tea in. He should have been immune to this... this... whatever it was. He had the standard 51st century immunity to any disease known to be infectious to humans at the time. He shouldn't be ill.
"Budge over." Gwen settled on the edge of the bed, crawling under the covers, and dragging the duvet over her head. "My head feels like it's going to explode."
Ianto sighed, making sure Jack had finished his tea before picking up the second mug, and heading for the other side of the bed to dose Gwen as well.
itinerant_vae's Write a fic, leave a prompt game. Plus two more stories from prompts given elsewhere.And... I need more prompts for cracky goodness. I am in the mood to write crack tonight. Prompt me?
Title: All Your Fault
Fandoms: Torchwood, Doctor Who, Star Wars
Other places of relevence: Foxhole
Rating: PG
"This is all your fault." Morgyn rolled over onto her side, pointedly turning her back on the man sitting on the edge of the bed. "Why the hell did I take you home in the first place?"
"Because I'm very persuasive." A hand rubbed her shoulder, and she shrugged it off irritably.
"No. You're not that persuasive." She paused, turning her head to look at Jack, a smirk on her face. "RTD is persuasive. Something about a guest-spot on an episode if I brought you and the Doctor for a visit."
Jack pouted a moment before shrugging. "What did you have in mind for a guest spot?"
"Oh, I was thinking I'd like to be the villian of the week on an episode of Doctor Who." She frowned, sitting up to look around the room. "Speaking of the Doctor, we should find him before he does something terribly embaressing, like fangirl at Yoda."
Jack rolled his eyes, grabbing his great-coat from where it was tossed over the back of a chair. "You sleep. I'll find the Doctor."
Morgyn was already grabbing her jacket, and hat. "Oh, no, you're not going out there alone. For all I know, you'll flirt with Obi-Wan and seduce him away from the Jedi, and then we'll have a code to deal with on top of whatever short the Extractor has this time."
Title: Drinks and an Umbrella
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: PG13
Prompt: Owen/Tosh - mixed drinks and umbrellas, from
matsujo9"One daquiri for the most brilliant woman this side of hell, and something... I'm actually not sure what it is." Owen set the drinks on the low table before flopping on the towel next to Tosh, safely in the shade of the over-sized umbrella stuck in the sand. "It's green."
Tosh raised her head, lifting her sunglasses with one hand to study Owen's drink a moment. "It looks dangerous."
"It's safe enough for humans, Tosh. Or they wouldn't serve it to me, remember?" Owen leaned on one arm, his gaze sweeping over Tosh slowly, an appreciative smirk on his face. "Did I ever tell you that you look very sexy in that swimsuit?"
Tosh returned his smirk, letting her sunglasses drop back into place before turning a page in her book. "Only every time you come back with another drink."
Owen's smirk widened a fraction, and he reached for his drink. He could take his time getting Tosh back to his hotel room. After all, it wasn't like the rest of Torchwood was actually looking for a way to go home, either.
Title: Dancing
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: PG13
Prompt: Torchwood team and dancing, from
donutsweeper"Are you sure about this?" Gwen eyed the dress Ianto had zipped her into dubiously in the mirror again. "I don't know if I could dance in this."
"You'll be fine." Jack gave her a charming smile, offering her his arm to escort her. "You look great, Gwen. I promise."
Ianto came back into the hotel lobby, smoothly stepping between Jack and Gwen, and wrapping his arm around her waist, reaching his hand for Jack's. "The car's here, and Owen and Tosh are already getting ahead of the schedule. Shall we go?"
Gwen giggled as Jack rolled his eyes, wrapping his hand around Ianto's, and heading for the door, pulling them along with him.
The music still hung in the air as the five stumbled back into into the Hub, dragged back to Cardiff from the alien dance club by the Rift Manipulator and their timer. Ianto and Gwen held each other up long enough to collapse on the couch, still winded from that last number Jack had dragged them out onto the floor for.
Owen sprawled in his chair, and dragged Tosh into his lap as Jack hummed along to the fading music, his eyes gleaming wickedly.
"Remind me which planet we just got back from?" Gwen leaned her head back against the wall, the cooler air of the Hub making her shiver a moment as the sweat began to dry on her skin. Ianto wrapped an arm around her, pulling her so her head rested on his shoulder, and she snuggled into his warmth.
"Denabi. Dancing as worship, the more complex, the more devotional." Jack grinned, grabbing Tosh's chair, and sat straddling it, his arms leaning against the back of it.
"For a fertility deity." Ianto added. "Usually ending in an orgy."
"Too bad we didn't stay for the finish then, isn't it?"
Title: Can We Keep It?
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: G
Prompt: alien unicorns, from
baffledking"Those are not what I was thinking when you said unicorns, Jack!" Gwen buried her face in Ianto's shoulder, trying to stop laughing.
"I did say they were alien unicorns!" Jack rolled his eyes as he headed for his office, peeling off his soaked shirt, and tossing it in the general direction of the hamper next to the autopsy room.
"They looked more like a mad science experiment, sir." Ianto was smirking, and settled Gwen in her chair before heading for the kitchenette to make some coffee.
"It was nice of them to invite you home with them." Gwen broke into another fit of giggles as Jack leaned out of his office to make a rude and suggestive gesture in her direction. "Aw, Jack, they liked you!"
"We would have come back for you," Ianto added, setting out three mugs on a tray. "They would have become bored sooner or later. They were still children."
"Looking for a pet!" Jack came out of his office, glaring at them both as Gwen giggled harder, and Ianto merely smirked, holding up the tray with mugs full of coffee.
Title: Alien Flu and Tea
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: G
Prompt: Jack has the flu, from
taffimai"Drink the tea, sir, it will help."
"I'm not sick, Ianto."
"You have a temperature of 102, you've gone through a box of tissues in the last hour, and you can't get out of bed." Ianto gave Jack a patient stare, holding the mug of tea to Jack's lips. "Drink the tea, sir."
Jack glared a moment longer before obediently opening his mouth, letting Ianto tip some of the tea in. He should have been immune to this... this... whatever it was. He had the standard 51st century immunity to any disease known to be infectious to humans at the time. He shouldn't be ill.
"Budge over." Gwen settled on the edge of the bed, crawling under the covers, and dragging the duvet over her head. "My head feels like it's going to explode."
Ianto sighed, making sure Jack had finished his tea before picking up the second mug, and heading for the other side of the bed to dose Gwen as well.
Crack Prompts
Jack as Alice in Wonderland.
Jack thinks he's a xerox machine.
The MiB have a turf war with Torchwood.
Alien donuts enter the LOTR universe.
Re: Crack Prompts
2 - *snerk* Let me sleep on that one
3 - *giggles* That has possibilities
4 - Oh, that's going to happen in the morning. So going to happen.
5 - Ditto 4.
Re: Crack Prompts
Re: Crack Prompts
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These are hilarious and cracky and wonderful! Thank you for making me smile! :-)
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Glad I made you smile!
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I'm not very good at creating prompts though, So I can't help there.