Rodney and the Dead Name
Mar. 17th, 2021 01:15 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
morgynleriThe last time I wrote a one-episode AU piece, it was shorter, and sans dialogue. It was also a fix-it AU for a major character death. This one is being more a reframing of the context of the dialogue in the episode, which changes so much. It makes the things which I find deeply unfunny more obviously unfunny, and delves into what makes the episode highly uncomfortable for me. And not in the sense of growth can be uncomfortable.
Depending on how long it takes me to get through it without pitching things at the walls, I might even have it donein the next couple of days. Or a week ago, depending on when people see this.
So, the episode does this "his name is Meredith, isn't that so funny for a man to have a girly name?" thing that wasn't funny the first time I saw the episode, and is infuriating on this rewatch. And the whole "here, have a cooler, more confident version of Rodney who has better relationships with everyone, this who he could be if he let go of his ego".... except that everything I see on screen doesn't make me think that Rodney has an ego the size of Atlantis so much as he has never had a place and people where he felt safe and secure, so he pushes them away by being abrasive and arrogant and rude, because than no one notices he's only pretending that their constant attempts to tear him apart don't hurt. And that no one cares unless he can do something for them doesn't hurt like hell.
And this episode just. Makes me so very, very angry.
(It’s still not done yet.)
This was first posted on Patreon a week ago! If you’d like to see these posts sooner, come sign up!
Depending on how long it takes me to get through it without pitching things at the walls, I might even have it done
So, the episode does this "his name is Meredith, isn't that so funny for a man to have a girly name?" thing that wasn't funny the first time I saw the episode, and is infuriating on this rewatch. And the whole "here, have a cooler, more confident version of Rodney who has better relationships with everyone, this who he could be if he let go of his ego".... except that everything I see on screen doesn't make me think that Rodney has an ego the size of Atlantis so much as he has never had a place and people where he felt safe and secure, so he pushes them away by being abrasive and arrogant and rude, because than no one notices he's only pretending that their constant attempts to tear him apart don't hurt. And that no one cares unless he can do something for them doesn't hurt like hell.
And this episode just. Makes me so very, very angry.
(It’s still not done yet.)
This was first posted on Patreon a week ago! If you’d like to see these posts sooner, come sign up!