Describe Your Stories Badly, very long AU edition

[morgynleri]

Behind the cut because some of these contain spoilers, and also, very long post.



Afanasiy - bored Immortal kidnaps and kills spy, spy wakes up, shenanigans ensue

Agnu Ra Nutû - fuck canon, fuck gender, and anyone who wants blood relationships to be important gets to go pout in a corner

All Her Daughters - the universe is not ready for a few dozen Shmi Skywalker clones with Jango clone partners, especially not the time traveling one-person’s-terrorist-is-another’s-freedom-fighter pair

Death’s Gifts - some Immortals get their own planet, and the universe’s oldest man is running scared from his not-so-dead-anymore brothers

Gods of Death - the Four Horsemen and the Daughter of the Sea, world terrified, news at eleven

Sail and Ocean - Methos hates islands even more than he did after the rowboat across the North Atlantic with six monks incident; a pirate thinks this is an invitation

Sea and Wolf - one very old sea-based Immortal and one very old steppe-based Immortal have a codependent mess of a relationship, and that’s before the world’s oldest Immortal ends them both

As It All Burns - grumpy Sith and cheerful rogue Jedi co-parent supernova in human form while another Sith attempts to burn down the galaxy, and an ex-Jedi makes that a little difficult

Ashes and Hope - supernova in human form would really like to go home now, but he has kids, surprise!wife, and a grumpy Jedi to look after

Astara and Aurora - choose your own insanity, polyam triad and kids not optional

The Avery Women - grumpy society girl turned cop with both husband and boyfriend kidnaps the chosen one and tells old bastard to fuck off

Born a Queen - annoying would-be god plays fast and loose with someone else’s DNA, and hands her off to her pseudo-mother’s CO to raise; the galaxy still hasn’t decided if they want to burn him at the stake for it

Burning Bridges - ex-Starfleet doctor undergoes species-reassignment surgery and is adopted by cranky ex-spy surgeon, saves lives and helps rebuild a shattered government

Cats and Murder Kittens - cats, cats everywhere, and some of them used to be dead?

Caught Between - Immortal and hopeless romantic mortal manage to make a muddle of saving each other’s lives, and accidentally spawn a new kind of not-mortal

A Cave For a Tower - do not encourage Mischief, she will just make you regret all your life choices, except maybe the one that ended a long-standing war

Children of Fire - BAU agent is a lot older than he looks, ex-System Lord goes home to sulk, their mother alternately terrifies and annoys the fuck out of the SGC

Children of the Order - ex-spies and ex-assassins rebuild flattened city and also government and planet, tell the rest of their people they’re fucking idiots if they get in their way

Chorus and Solo - kill the Sith, become a Sith, oh, and hey, look, dead Jedi to make things even crazier; sanity is overrated, stable would be nice

City of Magic - witch tracks down deceased friend’s employers, and then the people who killed her friend, and annoys her new CO in the process; scientist alternately elated about magic and regretting all his life choices

Darkness in the Light - tiny Padawan and Sith Apprentice team up and more than one person regrets their life choices

Daughter of the Forest - one of the Four Horsemen adopts tiny baby, massacres Nazis who kill her twenty something years later, she leaves fourty years after that, life gets interesting

Emily and Calla - mutant OCs, fuck canon, we do what we want

Wild Child - mutant OC makes life just a bit too interesting for one burned and cranky mutant spy and his explosion-happy girlfriend, also mutant OC’s uncle shows up when cranky mutant spy is kidnapped by his own government, makes everyone present regret their entire existance

Emperor Dooku - Jedi master has several children and a spouse without permission, tells Order to fuck off, becomes a politician, trains a supernova in human form after freeing said supernova’s mother, makes a Sith regret his life choices, and restructures a galactic government to put his wife and his adopted daughter-in-law in charge

Encounters With a Feral Cat - ... actually, what it says on the tin.

Eriador Architects - why, brain, did we decide a modern AU of the Hobbit was a good idea again?

Eternal Plantagenet - a once and future king dies in 1422 after attracting a corvid-loving deity’s attention, and history may not forgive me taking a sledgehammer to it

Muse of Fire - once and future king dies in 1422 after attracting a corvid-loving deity’s attention, and wakes up with one of the Four Horsemen watching over his casket; history may not forgive them having been allowed in the same room at the same time, nevermind the sledgehammer

Fairytales and Nightmares - canon, meet sledgehammer, shattered remains of canon, meet blender.

Feathers of Red - Vice Chancellor would like his cousin to stop being an idiot, and is not sure if his boss or his boss’s daughter is more trouble

Flame of Durin - Avari OC would like the world to stop giving him migraines, and also to make sense, because people are confusing

Fosterfar - world’s oldest Immortal raises three offspring of the God of Mischief, accidentally falls in love when they meet a thousand years later

Friends and Brothers - brothers both say fuck tradition, world goes to hell in a handbasket, but people are still awesome and kick ass

From Rome to Mexico - one ancient Immortal, two pretty old Immortals, one relatively young Immortal, and three not-yet-Immortals team up to defend a town, never actually bother to move on from each other

Gaearon Rhûnen - amnesiatic drug addict runs halfway across the world, cleans up, gets married, goes back home a different man

Gray Ships - whoever thought three wizards from a completely different universe being dropped into Middle Earth was a good idea? Me! (... and probably a bunch of other people, but they’re not wrangling this AU, and these two nut-cases and their far saner relative)

Green Fire - not-a-Jedi dates career politician and ex-slave, helps raise supernova in human form, stop a war, and probably turn a Sith into a smear on the pavement

Herald - Soldier - Priest - Iron Age Celt Immortal has life paths he keeps following over and over again, and accidentally falls in love with an island because of a king

Heroes Are Villains - superheros take over the world, tell secret-spy organization to fuck off, kidnap brain-washed assassin and unbrainwash him; lots of sex happens, and also there is tiny adorable child, snarking, and threatening heads of secret-spy organizations because Reasons

Horsemen - world’s oldest Immortal does not take kindly to ex-brother’s attempt to get the band back together, decides he’ll keep ex-brother’s new pets for himself once the band is dead, accidentally adopts green rage monster and super-soldier-assassin, would like world to stop being annoying

Holding Onto Each Other - poli-sci major, ex-carnie archer, and adopted deity tell the rest of the universe to fuck off, they do what they want

Immortals - world’s oldest Immortal forgot how good his oldest living student is at making him feel like a misbehaving school boy, and also at blackmailing him into teaching her newly-Immortal officially-dead agent how to be Immortal

Immortals of Arda - ex-nobleman and soldier meets world’s oldest Immortal, watches the world change, watches world’s oldest Immortal forget a lot, keeps running into reincarnated dwarves and getting drunk with them, eventually plays himself in a movie

In the Doctor’s Place - former head of state commits double genocide, and regrets her life choices, but no one knows what she's done but her

In the Silence and the Dark - scary Sith lord breaks Jedi Master, Jedi Padawan runs off with head of state, Sith Lord being a politician is very annoyed and then dead

Intersecting Transitions - three dead people end up in the same place and not so dead, and never do try to find their way home

Into the Fire - Jedi Knight crash lands on magical planet, aids a jailbreak and a murder, temporary madness ensues, magical planet's top magic people turn Sith Lord into a very thin paste

Jedi Leia - supernova turned Sith raises daughter with help of dead Jedi, her teenage rebellion phase involves blowing up a space station and toppling a galactic dictator

Last Stand of Valor - female chancellor laughs in the face of sex scandal, Jedi Master would like people to stop asking if he's been in a relationship with his own mentor or with his current student, supernova in human form falls in love with both her mentor and a king-turned-senator, Sith lord is frustrated by lack of choices he likes for apprentice

Lies, Misdirection, and Terrible Truth - Morgyn mythologizes a post-Avengers MCU AU, is very spaced out when writing the whole thing

Lieutenant to Chaos - time agent and time lord found secret agency, snark at each other through a relationship, don't actually manage to take over the world, drive another time lord spare

Lopt's Children - CSI gets shot, tells death to fuck off several times, is followed around by a mostly-invisible crow, and salvages mess of career; meanwhile, his boss is a deity's offspring, and doesn't tell anyone

Magic and Mischief - ex-terrorist fakes his own death, hires some people to help him break his brother out of jail, kidnap an infant war hero, and raises the chosen one with his brother and also a career military wife, shenanigans ensue

Masters of Light and Darkness - Avengers in Star Wars

Mechinations - take the view that the canon villain is just doing his best to do right by his people, and the canon head-honcho good guy is a manipulative fucker who pretends to work for the greater good, and by greater good, he means whatever he thinks it is

No Shield For My Soul - insane elf kidnaps dwarven prince, does foolish things and gets killed; dwarven prince adopted by warg pack, goes off and settles ancient home fortress while getting along with current local warlord orc, both try not to wake the balrog; orc fights evil overlord, and is very confused by flirty elf

Northern Night - everybody lives, nobody dies, many many people regret this

Ofinn Börn - god of mischief weaves himself children, they build their own family when forcibly separated from their father-maker, universe is not sure yet how much to burn the all-father at the stake for this

One Night In Moscow - crazy criminal boss and physicist puts himself at the disposal of CEO of most powerful corporation in the world, CEO's ex-boss and sorta-boyfriend doesn't like this, polyamory saves the day; the world is very glad CEO holds criminal's leash

Our Hands Will Never Be Clean - time-traveling Sith claims younger versions of favorite people, aims to burn the Jedi down, and also to bring Sith Master's plans crashing down around him

Philosopher's Stone - time-traveling witch accidentally summons Immortal spy to help her take over the world with the help of a medieval king

Red Snows and Winter Winds - polyamorous archer with his ice-giant-in-human-guise wife adopt her ex-bed partner - also a trickster god - as a third after discussions of why brainwashing people is bad and also why the fuck did he do it in the first place; others not entirely sure this is sane, but when have their lives been sane?

Remembered Valor - time-traveling soldier unfucks the timeline, and also fuck canon genders

Requiem Court - big bad is attempting to remake the world in his image, everyone's reincarnated and tell the big bad to fuck off, they'll reshape the world how they want it

Road to Mundburg - king's niece marries steward's son of her own choice, he lives, and there are adorable offspring

Running With Wolves - someone wasn't a fucking idiot and ran when she was supposed to, her son makes her father regret his life choices

Sailing Down the Volga - cranky physicist makes stuffy old men society regret ever discovering superhero girl; new superhero girl accidentally stumbles over him while off with her boyfriend, puts cranky physicist back in touch with only reasonable member of stuffy old men society

Scarred Souls - Morgyn decides to play with minor character, forgets AU exists for a decade

Seeds of the Dark - Jedi master is also Sith Lord, is annoyed that another Sith Lord wants to steal his padawan/potential apprentice out from under him, makes other Sith Lord regret his life choices

Shadowed Stars - changed trajectories of several people make the galaxy regret their entire existance

Shadows and Shades - immortal ex-cardinal and his sister spend several centuries plotting and living and loving

Sith Ascendant - Sith assassin finds tiny apprentice, surpasses his master, gets killed by a fallen Jedi, and watches his tiny apprentice, the fallen Jedi, and a supernova in human form make the galaxy regret their existance

Snakes and Lions - angsty teenage wizard accidentally discovers Immortal is someone famous long ago, makes a bargain to get trained by said Immortal, and lives to not entirely regret his life choices

Sons of the Temple - Jedi Master would like deadbeat mother to choose someone else to take her kids, gets former student to train one, accidentally is mom to the second, and trains the third while also badgering and bullying another Jedi Master into taking on a new student that he said he'd never take; Sith Lord is very cranky and eventually a smear, even if there is still a war in there

Supreme System Lord - brain snake hires dishonorably discharged ex-pilot who should never have been let go, later hires black-listed scientist, takes over ancient outpost in another galaxy before a joint expedition can arrive

Tarnished Silver - chosen one is in Slytherin, his girlfriend is in Ravenclaw, his boyfriend in Gryffindor, and the world regrets so much when they take over, and yet still thank them for it

Teeg's Choice - loyal lieutenant drives captain spare by protecting him from his own temporary madness, then follows him with a couple other officers when he tells the military they work for to fuck the fuck off

Their Name Is Death - ex-Jedi and two Mandalorian heads of state take over half the galaxy because the Jedi are creepy fuckers, and meanwhile, a Sith helps a queen-made-senetor, and they carve their own empire out too.

They Who Sleep in Elysium - immortal medieval king and Immortal Iron Age Celt have a centuries long love affair that continues on another planet when humanity takes to the stars

Time and Valar - time travel, adventure, politics, nobody dies but the villains, circle back around to the beginning, but not quite

Turncoat Wizards - wizard turned secret agent turned criminal mastermind turned secret agent AGAIN drives friends and employers up the wall, regrets nothing

Vader's Hands - the younglings live, and this changes everything

Vanko's Atlantis - crazy Russian physicist is head of sciences in international expedition instead of arrogant Canadian physicist, Wraith learn to regret this

We Are Defiance - close the age gaps, souls are sometimes visible but only to specific people, do not fuck with stable trios they are dangerous

A Wealth of Shadows - non-Banite Sith for fun and profit and polyamory everywhere

White Rose - do not give two Slytherins, one Ravenclaw, and a Gryffindor a chance to plot together, the only thing they're missing is a Hufflepuff to doom the world... oh, wait, that's the next generation, nevermind, doom is on its way

The Witch and Death - accidental time travel, accidental acquisition of Immortality, world's oldest Immortal does not like having to live a couple thousand years over again.

With the Purest Intentions - cranky witch ressurects friend who went mad, puts a leash on him, and hands leash to his wife, shenanigans ensue from there

Comments

[norcumi]

Ooo, GOOD idea (and ye gods, that list is awesome and terrifying! <3)

[morgynleri]

:D (And it's technically not even all of the AUs, just most of the named ones.)

... at some point I am going to watch people's reactions when I get my spreadsheet of doom entirely updated and can do statistics on my writing-to-date. Which. The incomplete list is currently at 744 stories totaling 1.5 million words, spread over 69 fandoms and 116 AUs. Written over approximately 20 years.

(And so. much. of that is unpublished, and I'm planning to adjust that as I get the spreadsheet of doom updated, and just. Whatever has something resembling a complete thought is going to get posted and tagged as abandoned, 'cause there's too much I just don't have the interest to finish.)